Metaphors - how are they helpful in therapy?

Analogies, metaphors and similes

Do you use metaphors, similes and analogies in your work with clients?

If so, do you find clients are able to relate to them?

I absolutely love using metaphors, similes and analogies when working with clients.  I find that having an image of either an everyday item, an image of something in nature or anything else that they know and can visualise, helps my clients to understand and process how they feel.

What are metaphors, similes and analogies?

Analogy

An analogy is the umbrella in which metaphors and similes come under. An analogy is the comparison of two things that share something similar – for example a human heart and a pump.  An analogy differs from a metaphor in that it is a lot more detailed.  It can feel a little like a story being told when being used to express a point of view or used to explain an argument.

Metaphor

A metaphor is a direct comparison which states that one thing is something else.  For example, life is a rollercoaster.

Simile

A simile is an indirect comparison because it likens one thing to another rather than stating one thing is another, like a metaphor does.  For example, the phrase, life is like a box of chocolates is a simile.

My favourites

I thought it might be helpful to some to share a few of my favourite analogies.  These have really helped clients to understand the way I work but also to understand their own processes.

The way I work

I like to explain to clients about the way in which I work as it gives them insight into what their sessions may look like in practice.  I always explain that they are in control about what they bring to their sessions, what they choose to speak about.  However, knowing how I will work with what they bring, gives my clients a better understanding of the process.  Many clients ask me what I think is the best therapy for them and this is another reason why I like to explain my way of working. An eclectic therapist would be able to answer that question after assessing the client, because a relevant and suitable technique will be selected for that client, for the purpose of their presenting issue.  However, as an Integrative Psychotherapist, I work by using a combination of different theories, methods and techniques to ensure that the client receives a more holistic approach, exploring different elements of themselves as part of the whole process.

I use the analogy of food to explain this to clients.  Take the ingredients of a roast dinner for example – meat or nut roast, potatoes, carrots, broccoli, cauliflower, parsnips, to represent elements of therapy that are used.  If you cook these as per a roast dinner instruction, all items separated on the plate, then this implies an eclectic approach, where all elements will be selected separately.  However, if you put all of those ingredients into a blender, you then have a soup, all the same ingredients perfectly integrated together and this is how I work.

What is therapy?

I tell my clients that therapy is gardening of the mind.  If they have a beautiful green lawn that is blighted by dandelions and other weeds every year, they could go out and mow the lawn and all will look wonderful again.  However, all that does is remove the issue at the surface level.  If they go round with a trowel and dig up the weed by its root, that particular issue is gone for good.  That is how therapy works, from the perspective of how I conduct my sessions.

Finding a good balance

I often work with clients who are stressed, anxious and overwhelmed with life and I encourage them to explore their needs and how to get those needs met.  Some clients who feel this way have a limited support network of family and friends and I encourage them to look at what needs are met by these people but also, what needs aren’t being met.

I use the idea of a spider and its web to explain this to clients.  The main aim of a spider’s web is for the spider to catch a fly – it’s food.  It’s a basic need that must be met.  If the spider only spins one strand, his chances of fulfilling that need are very low.  However, if he spins a much wider web with more strands to it, his chances of being fed are increased dramatically.  I explain to clients that if they rely on one person or one area of their life to fulfil all their needs, then their chances of success are limited.  If they look to other people, activities or services to fulfil their needs – spinning more strands to their web, their chances are greatly increased.

I hope that this blog has helped or inspired you to use analogies in your work with clients.  Please feel free to use the ones above if you feel they would resonate with any of your clients.

Best wishes

Hayley McAuley

Psychotherapist

Curious Counselling & Psychotherapy